Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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