Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
