Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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