hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I have tasted many bathrooms
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
