so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
