Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I just want nice things and good sex
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
