Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize