I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
