Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
