Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
