Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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