Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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