$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
