He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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