Do you still have your period?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
