all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
