I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
