Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
