She said her name was "party"
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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