Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
This girl is more easily done than said...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
