Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize
