The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
