Sponge bath it is.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize