Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
two words: eviction party
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
