I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Randomize
