Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
