Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
