So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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