i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
