For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
