I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I would fuck him just for his dog
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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