My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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