even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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