I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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