If i come over, it means nothing
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Randomize
