i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize