TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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