i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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