I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
My penis needs a shock collar
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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