Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.

(1-443): View more from Maryland

Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.

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(708): View more from Illinois

I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.

(910): View more from North Carolina

im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325

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(618): View more from Illinois

We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.

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(909): View more from California

Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.

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