can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
