whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
