Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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