good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
