wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
