I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
