Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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