i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
id be glad to
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
