Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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