Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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