its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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