so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
